Well, [PANK] is invading us tonight and while we have some idea of what's going to happen, having never been invaded before, we mostly have no clue what to expect.
The fer sher bits are as follows:
We are supremely excited that [PANK] wants to party with us.
There are going to be six readers who are primed to tear down the stage with their brilliant words and ultimate excellenticity.
Reading for [PANK]
Reading for Paper Darts
Holly Hansen of Zoo Animal is going to strum up a storm.
But other than those things...sorry dudes, no clue.
Could be like this
Could be like this
Who knows, it could even be like this
But most likely it'll be like this, so don't worry.
No matter what
Hot and fresh from our computer screens to yours, here are the top ten arty dishes being eaten up online lately.
01. Wes Anderson and Roman Coppola’s “filmmercial” for Prada
All I can say is, if someone were to break into my apartment, they’d better bring me some cake.
02. Rap quotes as street signs in New York City
From Busta Rhymes to Jay-Z, hip-hop is invading NYC—again—one street sign at a time.
03. The extraterrestrial world of whiskey art
You don’t have to wait two hours after eating to explore the tiny alien oceans at the bottoms of these whiskey glasses.
04. New York Times haikus
Just one more clever/Tumblr to clog your dashboard,/but this one is cool.
05. Animal portraits by Yago Partal
There’s probably another planet where animals have been dressing like this for over 12,000 years.
08. “Helveticat” print: a font made of cats
Cats + typefaces = instant internet sensation.
10. The Ways We Separate Deluxe Art Edition
The case for this vinyl album is made entirely out of sugar. But after I eat it, what’s supposed to hold the record?
I sell used books, and I am an English major.
One of these has taught me lots of useful things about American literature.
Here are some of them:
Old women drive the fiction market.
Plenty of people read fiction, and everybody should, so be it from me to generalize. But let me put it this way: I have never seen a young man come in with a 8 ½ x 11 list of titles for his book club, one of which is (always) Gone Girl. Somebody's grandma, on the other hand? Every day. What does this mean or matter? For one thing, women in general read significantly more fiction than men. For another thing, maybe you should start asking your grandma which new hardcover you should buy next. She's probably more in the know than you are.
National Geographics are heavy, and nobody wants them.
You could build a hospital in Uganda with the sheer volume of National Geographics I throw out in a month. I don't know if anybody's done a study on this, but I suspect NG's subscription rate might have taken a hit around the same time that adolescents worldwide discovered they could just google “nude pigmies.”
Nobody who knows anything about Fifty Shades of Grey actually buys it.
The typical customer who is looking to buy a used copy of this book (“used” in this case hopefully means “pre-owned,” as opposed to the more primitive sense) is not looking for “Fifty Shades of Grey.” They are looking for “Fifteen Grades of Stay” or “The Grey Shades Book” or “Eat, Grey, Love.” All they have are those little phonetic bites from the last time one of their girlfriends mentioned it. It always throws them for a loop when they hear it's in Erotica, but that doesn't stop them from buying it anyway, even if their kids are with them. Eww.
People like to pretend they are addicted to books.
Anybody who enjoys reading is bound to be totally irrational when it comes to buying books. Book-buying is one of those things you can feel good about sinking money into. Which means it is really easy to buy books you will never read. I am no exception. Part of this may have to do with people feeling really good about supporting print, as opposed to e-books (a source of romanticized paranoia for the book fanatic). Another part might be the unspoken, but widespread, belief that an unread book emits some vaporous form of knowledge that can be absorbed through the skin. Once you own a book, why bother reading it? Lots of people are willing buy a leather-bound Easton Press edition of Moby Dick. Not so many are willing to read it. Moral is, just having a full bookshelf doesn't make you well-read. Books don't work like they do in Minecraft.
They printed way too many paperback copies of Middlesex, and way too many hardcovers of Freedom.
Seriously. I could throw a ratty Danielle Steele into the recycling bin and hit a copy of Middlesex or Freedom every time. I understand these are both fantastic books. So what are they doing buried under The Last Song and The Host? One word: Oprah.
There are seven cookbooks, sixteen children's books, and two novels all written by one Crescent Dragonwagon.
Someone with this name must get book contracts thrown at them. “A Miss Dragonwagon to see you, sir.” “A miss who? First name?” “Crescent.” “Holy Ploughshares, get that woman a contract. And bring up that formatting we use for Patterson all the time, the one with the author's name ten times bigger than the title. Ahh, miss Dragonwagon, sign here please. Now, is that pronounced as in wrench, or do you prefer cresahhnt?”
Be nice to the people buying Tarot cards and Wiccan spellbooks.
Because you just never know.
I'm not sure if the '90s are back or if the future is here, but I dig it. Let's get shiny.
Holly Harrison, Marketing Director and multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent
These ten pieces have been popping in the art world this week.
1. Bubble wrap paintings by Bradley Hart
Okay, so popping this bubble wrap is out of the question, but good on Brad for giving us an alternative way to enjoy it.
3. Faces emerge from spilled stainless steel
If only something this cool happened every time I knocked over a beverage. Then again, it’d be way harder to get the stain out of the carpet.
4. “Too Much Night, Again” woven art
The writing is on the wall for this one, but it’s also a giant, navigable yarn installation made by Pae White. Don’t tell the cat.
5. Moving light sculptures by Mihoko Ogaki
These sculptures of galaxies shining through holes in dead or dying bodies are by far the prettiest idea of what the afterlife looks like.
6. Tilda Swinton snoozes in a glass box
I so envy all the lucky bastards who get to observe the phenomenon that is Tilda Swinton during The Maybe at MoMA.
8. “Tainted” wood carvings by Aron Demetz
Figures of human beings rise out of tree stumps, showing that humans are the, er, root of nature’s problems, and vice versa.
9. Lush photographs of animals in sacred spaces
It was Ms. Peacock in the teal room with the panes of glass. Beautiful India is the perfect backdrop for Karen Knorr’s photos of equally beautiful animals.
10. Edible cityscape made for Swedish food lab
This model of a city’s infrastructure is entirely edible, because Swedes know the right way to play with food. Take notes, Google Maps.